the geekiest geek that ever geeked

is fixed now. As I was finding stuff to delete since I noticed that the lappy is starting to go slow, I found a letter that I wrote on MS Word when I was very very sober on my last break up. Looking at it now, it’s pretty funny. Hahahaha.

It leaves me dumbfounded when it only takes A MATTER OF SECONDS for someone to do a VERY IMPORTANT, yet, VERY SIMPLE task, yet it’s like a very time-consuming thing to do in their part.

What? Is it that hard?

Step 1) Add as a friend…

Step 2) View wall post…

Step 3) Like that wall po-IT’S PHYSICALLY IMPOSSIBLE! Can’t do it! Derp!

Assholes.

Don’t worry. I leave grudges behind after a day or two. But for tonight? Well, let’s just say I’m veeeeeeeeeeery very hostile right now.

F*cking assholes.

to be or not to be, just as said by Shakespeare,
it’s not really damn good to be here,
the feeling that you just want to go to purgatory,
just so you can’t feel anymore of this agony.

to be or not to be, to say or nay,
decision making is driving me crazy by night and by day,
making me scratch my head and wipe my face,
to face a losing victory or just sheer disgrace?

to be or not to be, to act now or to stay stagnant,
I know my liabilities and I know of your sudden arrogance,
I have a few, no not few, many wrongs before,
and we share the same amount, making mistakes galore.

to be or not to be, to stand up or to sit still,
to go out or to wait for death to perch on my windowsills,
don’t take it literal, by death I mean regret,
wait a minute, do I even regret us having met?

to be or not to be, to be brave or to be scared,
if I say neither, would that make my nose flare?
I guess I just have to answer it myself,
before my lifebar gets low on it’s health.

make it quick, make your decision,
don’t say in a minute, right now take action,
if you make delay, in the end you’ll pay
damn regret will get stuck in all of your days

don’t know what to do and don’t know how to do it,
this damn thing is making me lose it,
oh my God, what am I doing?
my enemy is myself, and still I hate losing?

the other side tells me go for it now,
because it’s better to do it early than just taking that damn bow,
you’ll just have the regret of keeping it in,
but what if I lose, and it’s the opponent that would win?

that’s what the other side says and he has a point,
and he made it clear like a pen having a new ball point.
my enemy is myself, what the hell is going on,
I hope I make the decision before any other dawn.

…I’m worthless.

It’s kinda funny how I always say, trying to convince myself, that insults don’t mean anything. That I’m used to them. That my childhood is filled with insults and teases and somehow painful stuff that when I’m insulted by a person these days, I try to shrug them off like lint that just happen to get stuck on your shoulders.

I even insult myself, just to increase my ‘resistance’. I know I’m like this, no need to insult me. I know I’m like that, no need to say it anymore. I am like that, I know.

But it really is an exception… When it comes from somebody who you really cared for. From one who you really liked. From one you were devoted to for some time but you know you wanted it to last more. From one you eventually learned to… adore.

Each degrading statement, from that kind of person. It stings, no scratch that, it hurts, no that’s not it too…

IT’S DEVASTATING.

Your insults are like sticks and stones, and my bones are like my chest now. If that makes sense.

ngayon palang ay babalaan na kita,
para malaman mo na aking sinta,
pagkakalimot ay aking sakit,
ang frequency nito ay kay lupit

hindi rin ako ang pinakamaperang tao,
pero ito ang sasabihin ko sayo,
di kita mabibilhan ng mga gamit na mahal,
pero kung ikaw ay isang relihiyon, ako’y magpapakabanal

napapansin ko nang sayo ako’y naaadik,
kaya mag ingat ka na kung ako ay lalapit
hindi ko alam kung ang dapat kong gagawin
kung simpleng bati lamang o ikay biglang yayakapin

hindi halata pero ako’y isang romantiko,
handa akong magsakripisyo parang si hesus na nilalatigo,
pero minsan ako rin ay napaka arte
baka magduda ka kung ako’y lalake o babae

babalaan din kitang bigla akong makakaisip ng banat
ikaw ang magsabi kung kesong matamis o kesong maalat
ipagpatawad mo rin ang aking sobrang kakesohan
pero nagpapasalamat ako kung ito’y iyong nagugustuhan

ilan ang gusto mong stanzas, anim o walo
kasi sa totoo lang nauubusan na ako
ng mga paraan para tugmain ang mga babala
kaya pagkatapos ng next stanza tatapusin ko nalang bigla

may rason kung bakit ang tema ng tula
ay hindi pagconfess ng nararamdaman kundi mga babala
ang rason ay hindi ko kayang paikliin ang mga itutugma
dahil kulang ang isang tula para sabihin lahat ng nadarama

Glad I slept for at least 4 hours or else I’m going to faint early due to over fatigue. I don’t have a reason for writing this, heck, I shouldn’t even be writing this. Final exams are going to be held tomorrow. The cavalry is almost over, but at what cost for me to finish it. I’m a selfish guy right now, I can but I won’t give a crap about what others would say if I bragged that I have 4 exams in a row tomorrow. If you have 5? Well, I can say that your day tomorrow will be a little bit more sucktacular compared to mine. But I think this is the first time I’ll be having 4 exams in a row, I just hope I can still retain whatever I’m relearning this early in the morning, but that would be impossible. ENG014 and HUM011 on the same day is okay, but alongside with MATH021(Calculus) and CS105P(Database)? Jeez. Short rant is short!

I could say any kind of shit right now.

I can review an old movie.

I can review a new movie.

I can be productive about an NSTP subject.

I can do anything besides currently writing a ‘blog’.

I can practice singing again, for all time’s sake.

I can purchase a Pugad Baboy from National Bookstore, unfortunately I’m saving money for personal reasons, and I’m not in National Bookstore to begin with.

I can type in the keyboard slowly by looking at the keyboard itself, but I choose not to so I can improve my typing skills.

I can sleep early, but this family business of ours is not letting me.

I can rap battle with myself, but that would make me look like a total retard.

I can play Perfect World Online again, but thinking about the game that made me bored makes me bored in return.

I can study for my finals, but give me a break, come on.

I can define boredom but that’s boring.

I can buy a snack along with watching a movie online.

I can think of anything, but I can’t think of anything anymore to type.

Ever tried eating a dish that’s composed of different types of foods that you liked? I did, I hated some, and I liked some. I believe that this metaphor explains this movie, at least for me. So, did I like it or hate it? As an action movie enthusiast, I liked it VERY MUCH.

Every movie has it’s flaws, some has a lot of flaws, some very few. This is an action flick, so expect flaws. Meh story, cheesy romance. Also a little predictable. As the movie goes, you’d guess what happens, especially when you come to the middle point, you know how it’s going to go down, you know what kind of ending it’ll be. What else can I say here. Oh, this is a fantasy. Unless there are really guys who are capable of doing sh/t that these guys did. But even if there were, they won’t be able to match against soldiers. A small army of TRAINED soldiers. I’ve said this before many times that it’s become a habit so say it, and I’ll say it again, this is LARGER THAN LIFE. A fantasy.

With that said, why did I like this movie very much? Because it’s an action flick that’s why. Not just any action flick though, it’s just an action flick composed by a hardcore, bad-ass, iconic, action star ensemble. The names aren’t that much too. It’s just STALLONE, STATHAM, LI, ROURKE, CREWS, COUTURE, AUSTIN, LUNDGREN, with a little bit of WILLIS and SCHWARZENEGGER. With that squad of action icons, you know that this flick won’t just leave a scratch, it will be written down in the book of action flicks that must be seen to believe because with this cast it just seems to good to be true.

Another thing I liked so much about this movie is that it really delivered as an action flick. It’s like an RPG game, they had characters that defined them and they delivered their own definition by showcasing it through the battle field.

• Stallone is the old dog, the experienced one, the oldest maybe. He’s the perfect blend. Balanced. Good gunman, good hand to hand combatant.
• Statham. My favorite of the bunch, not just because he’s The Transporter, but he’s like a young perfect blend with a special love for daggers and knives. And because of those weapons, he became the ultimate bad-ass in this movie, for me at least.
• Li, the fast one. He’s the martial artist in the group, but he can hold a gun, not as good as the 2 previous ones though. Takes advantage of his disadvantage in some parts, and he killed it.
• Crews, the stereotypical black guy. I’m not trying to be racist here, but he showed why stereotypes are scary. I liked him here, he provided the comedic sauce, and it worked.
• and Couture. The hand-to-hand combatant. He’s a UFC fighter, of course you’ll hope he’ll showcase his skills here. And he didn’t disappoint.

They made it work. Not just these guys, even the baddies. Eric Roberts did a good job as the main antagonist. Having their own characteristics, they delivered and it was well delivered.

I liked it that much, but still I don’t love it. I was confused at first on how should I rank it, a 3 or a 4 out of 5. But I really felt a 4/5, so yeah, 4/5.

PS. Ever watched X-Men: The Last Stand? Hoping you’d see a Juggernaught VS Colossus showdown? They didn’t right? In this flick, they won’t disappoint you, they’ll give you the showdown you WANT to see.

Pic came from: http://themovieblog.com/2010/06/the-expendables-final-poster

I’m at MCL, with nothing to do, killing time as I type this “blog” or something. But then I remembered a movie that entertained me as much as it’s predecessor movie did, Clerks II. Mainly because of the two memorable characters from both the part I and II. Jay and Silent Bob. Those guys just make me laugh hysterically, even though I’m a guy that laughs pretty easily at some corny jokes and some typical gags. Jay and Silent Bob are different though. With Jay’s f-bombing mouth and Silent Bob’s, err, profound silentness, they are an unlikely but a likeable duo. Thus a quote that I find memorable shall be quoted here. Take note that this is not the exact lines, just how I remember the line.

“Buyer 1: Won’t you be tempted to smoke your shit?

Jay: Not with the power of Christ on my side!

Buyer 2: Is that a f*cking Bible?”

Jay: Show some respect, it’s the Holy f*cking Bible son!”

Yeah, not exact but those who watched the movie will know what really happened.